‘Liever een wachtwoord voor Netflix dan een verlovingsring
De 20 grappigste dingen die vrouwen deze week zeiden op twitter volgens de Huffpo. Zoals: vinden sokken een scheiding net zo treurig als mensen? Of: iemand anders moet vanavond het sekssymbool zijn, ik vond net avocado in mijn haar.
No one I know who wears tennis shoes plays tennis. Let's change the name to podcasting shoes.
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) 5 oktober 2016
Someone else is going to have to be a sex symbol tonight. I just found avocado in my hair.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) 5 oktober 2016
I love taking a nap after a long day of doing absolutely nothing
— Brittani Nichols (@BisHilarious) 7 oktober 2016
Fight or flight? Nah, I'm more hide or nap.
— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) 30 september 2016
I'd rather get an HBOgo password than an engagement ring
— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) 7 oktober 2016
Oh fuck I'm just finding out about national boyfriend day now??? But how will I have enough time to blast myself into outer space??
— Emma Barrie (@emmabarrie) 4 oktober 2016
I need to create an email canned response that says "Sorry I missed the event. Was gonna come but I got to my room and took off my bra."
— Awesomely Luvvie (@Luvvie) 5 oktober 2016
[at crime scene]
Me: Please step aside, I've seen like 436 episodes of Criminal Minds
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) 5 oktober 2016
HEAR ME OUT: sarah jessica parkour (sex & the city-themed obstacle course)
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) 5 oktober 2016
Woke the kids up with a smile, and a song. They started screaming for their real mom to come back
— Suburbia_Mommy (@runner_mom2) 30 september 2016
A paper cut from the book you're reading is revenge from a judgmental tree that's just disappointed in your choices in literature.
— Beatriz (@wittwitbarista) 5 oktober 2016
Ah yes! It's that magical time of year when the cobwebs in my house suddenly become decorative.
— Blu (@TwoSapphiresBlu) 3 oktober 2016
The fact that I can make coffee BEFORE I've had coffee just proves I'm a wizard
— 🌴EnvyDaTropic™🌴 (@envydatropic) 4 oktober 2016
if i can keep a box of cheez-its unopened for 9 days I most certainly can keep your internet secrets
— Her Tomb Boots (@fuzzlime) 3 oktober 2016
[to kids] Do not make me come in there!
[to myself] because i'm so comfortable
— Amanda (@Manda_like_wine) 6 oktober 2016
Friend: OMG did u see the thing on the news about the sinister clowns?
Me: *flashback to me watching the debate* yeah I think I saw that
— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) 4 oktober 2016
idk why but i feel v strongly that amanda knox is super into the hamilton soundtrack
— Jessica Roy (@JessicaKRoy) 5 oktober 2016
Can I get wine delivered?--4pm musings
— Christina Anderson (@Xtina_Anderson) 5 oktober 2016
I wonder if breakups are as hard for socks as they are for people.
— Olivia Caridi (@OliviaCaridi) 1 oktober 2016
